Swim #934 — Evidence
Confidence Is a Lagging Indicator
Today’s training schedule called for an 8,000-yard swim.
The longest swim of my life.
I dreaded it.
My confidence sagged.
Part of me wondered if I was all talk.
Maybe I wasn’t really cut out for marathon swimming.
My training since January suggested otherwise, but there was a stubborn part of my brain that refused to look at the evidence.
So I went anyway.
I arrived at Walden Pond at 5:20 a.m.
The air was warm.
The water looked terrible.
Crusts of pollen lined the shore and large patches of the pond were covered with a thin yellow film.
Not exactly inviting.
I briefly considered going home.
Instead, I pulled on my cap and goggles and stepped into the water.
My plan was simple.
Break the swim into eight segments of roughly 1,000 yards each.
Nothing more.
Just get to the next thousand.
The first segment felt easy.
The second felt easy too.
Soon I stopped thinking about the full distance altogether.
Just another thousand.
Then another.
Then another.
My shoulders started aching around 4,000 yards and continued to complain for the rest of the swim.
But something surprising happened.
The distance never became overwhelming.
The swim remained manageable.
One segment at a time.
When I finally finished, I was tired.
But not destroyed.
In fact, I felt like I had more in the tank.
More importantly, I had something else:
Evidence.
Evidence that the training is working.
Evidence that the 10K is within reach.
Evidence that my doubts are not always reliable narrators.
I’ve noticed something about confidence.
For many people, confidence seems to come first.
For me, confidence has always been a lagging indicator.
I don’t gain confidence by believing.
I gain confidence by doing.
Show up.
Do the work.
Gather evidence.
Let confidence catch up later.
This morning’s swim didn’t make me confident.
It gave me evidence.
And evidence is far more convincing.
Swim #934
8,052 Yards
274,066 Yards This Year
1,693,123 Yards Lifetime